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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28284426">if the fates allow</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mia_Zeklos/pseuds/Mia_Zeklos'>Mia_Zeklos</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shadowhunters (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Christmas, Fluff, Gift Giving, Growing Up Together, Jalec Secret Santa 2020, M/M, Parabatai Bond, and now I have to make peace with that somehow, anyway Merry Christmas folks!, realised halfway through this that it was just a long winded version of that one Folgers commercial, the moral of the story is pretty much the same which I guess is actually heartwarming in a way, used as a love language here</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 23:14:20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,743</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28284426</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mia_Zeklos/pseuds/Mia_Zeklos</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>His parabatai never asks for specific gifts; not when it truly matters. So Jace makes it his mission to figure out what Alec wants more than anything, year after year.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alec Lightwood/Jace Wayland</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>35</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>if the fates allow</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bells_Hunt/gifts">Bells_Hunt</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Written for Bells_Hunt for the Jalec Secret Santa! Merry Christmas, B! I hope your holidays are going wonderfully and that you have a beautiful new year!<br/>Title taken from the Frank Sinatra's unforgettable <i>Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas</i> because, come on. What else would serve that well?<br/>Hope this is enjoyable, and, as always, feedback is most welcome!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>”You don’t celebrate holidays in Idris?”</p><p>It almost sounds like an accusation. Jace does his best not to feel offended at the horror in his new friend’s eyes, less because of the question and more because it feels like no matter what answer he gives, pity is sure to follow.</p><p>As is, Isabelle beats him to the explanation and – as seems to be a frequent case with the Lightwoods – makes things significantly worse than they had been before she’d tried to help. “Don’t be ridiculous, Alec. Of course they have holidays. Maybe Michael just doesn’t like Christmas. I’ve heard the Branwells don’t do the gift thing either.”</p><p>“I <em>did</em> get presents.” They had rarely been what he’d asked for – or would have ever thought to ask for, even – but, according to his father, they had all been things he’d <em>needed</em>. “It’s just this— Secret Santa thing. You can’t do that with just two people.” <em>Now</em> he looks like he’s justifying himself, but Jace is past caring for the intricate details of human interaction when he has as many questions as he’s got. “Who even <em>is</em> Santa?”</p><p>By the look the Lightwood siblings give each other, he’s not entirely sure they know, either. “Listen, that’s not the point. The secret is the key part. You draw a name out of a hat and you have to get that person a gift. Now, you don’t know anyone here that well,” she continues with the same tactless abandon that he’s still not quite used to, “but it’s all right. It doesn’t have to be something expensive. It’s all just so we can give even the people who will be on hunt duty on Christmas Eve something to look forward to, you know?”</p><p>He doesn’t know. “Sure.”</p><p>“Tell you what,” Alec says, his sister barely out of earshot, “I’ll just put a red dot on the paper with my name on it and tell Mother to let you draw one first. Get me <em>The Art of War</em> and we’ll call it a day. The library won’t let me keep their copy forever and I want one.”</p><p>That sounds a little more manageable, except, “I’ll put a green dot on mine, then. I want a utility belt like the one your father has.”</p><p>Alec sighs with the long-suffering expression of someone burdened with all of the world’s sorrows. “You’re not understanding the spirit of the tradition, Jace.”</p><p>He doesn’t seem to understand it either, seeing as both he and Isabelle have only the most basic grasp on what Christmas even is, so, “If we’re going to cheat anyway, we might as well both do it, right?”</p><p>His friend contemplates it for all of an instant. His keen sense of justice must have been satisfied, because a moment later, he shrugs. “It’s a deal.”</p><p>~.~</p><p>By the time Christmas rolls around on their first year as parabatai, Jace had had enough time in the institute to establish himself as a capable warrior – and, thankfully, to earn his fair share in money they could use in the mundane world to go along with the allowance provided by the Clave. He and Alec hadn’t felt the need to cheat the system in a long time – now, he can join in with whatever it is that tradition demands of him and give his parabatai something he had known he’d want. This might be cheating, too, for someone looking from the outside in – the way he can feel Alec’s enthusiasm and joy spark up at the sight of certain things, even if it’s just in the back of his mind. For anyone outside of the Lightwood family, his gifts are impersonal and convenient; things they can use in their day to day life. It’s hardly a chore – they all lead the same lives, after all.</p><p>Alec’s case is a whole different ordeal.</p><p>His parabatai never asks for anything; not outright. For him, surprise is the most important part of the holiday when he’s not trying to help Jace out and make him feel more at home in an Institute he’d never set foot in before – it had become apparent over the years that he cherished few things more than his family’s joy at something wanted but unexpected. It hadn’t taken Jace long to start appreciating the sentiment for what it is and now, as he watches his parabatai tear through the wrapping paper of something soft and too fine to be hunting gear, frowning in concentrated anticipation, he knows he’s hit the mark once again.</p><p>The ceremonial robes – the ones they’d need to use when they would be invited to participate in yearly Council meetings this year, finally – slip through his fingers and pool on the carpet at his feet.</p><p>“Oh!” Maryse sounds both intrigued and a little confused, but Jace barely registers her surprise, more focused on the sheer delight Alec’s eyes had lit up with. “Now <em>that’s</em> promising. We just thought it was a little early, right, Robert?”</p><p>“Right.” The confirmation is just as puzzled as her question had been and Jace almost feels bad for not doing this in private when Alec drops his gift behind and comes closer, pulling him into one of those rare hugs that he gives out instead of just enduring. Their presents had been far more impressive – definitely more expensive, too – but Jace, simple as the idea had been, had <em>known</em>. Ever since Alec had been introduced to the idea of being Head of the Institute, shooting upwards into any opportunity within the Clave had become something of a priority. The only thing he’d missed so far had been looking the part.</p><p>“Thank you,” his parabatai whispers, as if he’d been given the world’s most precious treasure instead of a state-demanded ceremonial uniform, and Jace laughs, his ‘<em>anytime</em>’ getting lost into their embrace.</p><p>He means it, but it’s all right if Alec hadn’t heard – he knows that, too. No matter what uncertainties their life would manage to throw at them eventually, this – the knowledge, the recognition they’d shared since the very start – would remain the only constant.</p><p>~.~</p><p>Idris, Jace had found over the years, is excellent at picking itself up from the ashes in the quietest way imaginable.</p><p>He marches through the portal unnoticed, hoping to remain so until he’d somehow managed to get into his parabatai’s quarters – not an easy task, given the position he holds in the Clave now, but he does his best all the same. <em>Surprise is key</em>. A lot had changed over the years, but this particular trait of Alec’s had persisted.</p><p>For once, he hadn’t figured out a gift before arriving. With the sort of money they both make now, neither of them is really in want for anything, but that had rarely been the point – practical gifts are for the rest of the world, after all. He walks through the mostly deserted streets – in that regard, Shadowhunters and mundies aren’t at all different; the holidays mean a few days of frantic shopping frenzy, followed by the quiet of everyone being holed in their homes for celebration, or – as it currently is – last preparations for it.</p><p>He had been meant to arrive with Izzy and Clary (memories still fuzzy, if returning steadily by the day) three hours from now, but it had been impossible to wait even a second longer at the prospect of what would await him on the other side of the portal. Isabelle had taken yet another long-suffering look at the way he’d marched up and down the hallways, bags packed, and had told him to just leave. He’d jumped at the opportunity, but here, now, he finds himself a bit at a loss.</p><p><em>What could Alec need?</em> Better yet, what would he <em>want</em>? Jace had always tried to go with both the most obvious – to him and him alone – choice; something that would make his parabatai happy and serve him well at the same time. Need and want tend to be the same thing when it comes to Shadowhunters, and even more so when it comes to Alec, so the list of options isn’t all that long. Resigned to his fate, Jace ducks into a weapons shop.</p><p>And runs directly into someone else; someone who holds him steady once he slips with a grip that feels <em>far too familiar</em> to be anyone else.</p><p>“Alec?”</p><p>This is all happening in the wrong order, Jace recognises vaguely as he looks up and meets his parabatai’s eyes. Alec hadn’t been supposed to know he had even <em>arrived</em>.</p><p>“Jace?” They’re still standing in the middle of the store, he realises, but it doesn’t really seem to matter – not even with the shopkeeper’s curious eyes on them. “I thought you were coming this evening.”</p><p>“Surprise?” He had managed that much, at least. If his parabatai is with him the whole day, the plans he’d had would have to change drastically, and he’d have to think of something even sooner than he’d thought. <em>What could Alec need?</em> The same question plagues him yet again, and in the end, few things had served either of them as well as honestly had, the answer be damned. “I’m not really ready for tonight yet, but—”</p><p>“It’s all right.” Alec, hand still on Jace’s shoulder, guides them back outside, the bag he’s carrying – doubtlessly also full of gifts – hastily shoved into one of his coat’s bottomless pockets. “You’re <em>here</em>; that’s as ready as it gets. Let’s go home. It’s freezing out here.”</p><p>He would beg to differ, but his parabatai’s unshakeable confidence is as infectious as it had ever been. <em>Home</em>. Those words mean different things to both of them now, and after over a year, it only stings a little, but even that eases away now at the certainty that the statement had brought with itself. If home is where the heart is, then they’d both known who to turn to for a long, long time.</p><p>“Home it is, then,” Jace concedes, smile brighter than it had felt in years. His parabatai had never been particular about gifts, and he had always managed to pinpoint exactly what he’d needed. The solution this time, as it appears, is as simple and as complicated as it had ever been before. “It’ll be a while before everyone else arrives.”</p><p>“I know.” There’s so much warmth in that one sentence that it’s nearly unbearable. “Thank you for coming, Jace.”</p><p><em>What could Alec need?</em> He has his answer now.</p><p>“Anytime.”</p>
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